


love is love #nohate

by brainlessomniscent



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Supernatural, The Hunger Games (Movies), Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: F/M, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Marauders, Marauders Friendship, Marauders' Era, Multi, Post-Marauders' Era, Sexual Tension, Watersports, dean is triggered by cake, destruction of property, ew sorry no kink shaming right, too hot to handle, tw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2018-08-18
Packaged: 2018-11-30 05:46:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11457231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brainlessomniscent/pseuds/brainlessomniscent
Summary: i am a vapire....This is written for IRONIC PURPOSES ONLY. #nohate (haha get it? like the title)but legit, its merely a reflection on our poor humor than any true writing or opinions on these fandomsThanks!





	1. i am a vapire

**Author's Note:**

> btw my bbff jess helped my write this ;)

i met edwared cullenin 1980s his dark phase. if only i knew whaty a cark character whoukld get me in too. I wouldnt meet my love until this tyear we hated each other at firt because as all tragic love stories, we were star crossed lovers.

like in the song. taylor swift.

ah that good old tay tay is a sweet girl.

but anyway.

i ma a vampire.

he is a wearwolf .

i am jess cullen.

he is Seth Clearwater.

Like fire and ice

we cut each other off

and were a perfect balance.

he is hot af

while im clearly cold as oice.

thi s is our story

this is how va,pire wolf vbabies wer born.


	2. our meeting firdst (trigger warning, dARK THEMES)

it was a dark summer day in forks washington.

i was wearing a smnazzy Pink floyd short (shirt), hot pinmk like the streaks in my ravasshing dark hair. my tiny red skirt hoveried over my black legging, tucked neatlu into my white doc martins.

off course alice had dressed me today. she does everyday.

pretty sexy if you think about it.

shes like my mom tho.

then i saw him walking into a story,

no like litterally.

my story and it was a bookstore.

i went

"why is a wolf on this part of town? word" i sawid sassily, snapping my bubblegum.

Rosaline sniffed and replied even sassilier, "I get u."

He replied even more sassilier, "nobody cares about youre opinion"

rosalie hissed at him and i spit at his shoe

nobody ased a weherewolf scum lie you." I snared. i am katniss everdean me and gale have been BBFLLILI. When i was in the games I fell in love with cato i saved him instead of peta.

me and cato and gil were bbfllili together and where hunting now

"i want yo sleep with you " kato says.

"nuh uh" gaile replied.

"yuh huh" kayto replied.

"guys stop fiteing over me" i cri. "lets just have a threesome."

and then wer fucked.


	3. Soopernatural (DEAN AND CAS FUMIK)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's in the title geez, totally not click bait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy this 100% SERIOUS FANFICTION from me and my boo ;-* love you readers!!!!!1asadsfdgfhgjk

SAM IS ON A BEER RUN. 

DEAN IS GOING OVER THE CASE NOTES again. 

Geez you’d think they’d know how to take down a ghost by now right?

But of course, theres an unusual polot twist hindering their usual FLAWLESSability. 

Dean mumbles to himself, “i sure wish i had cas right about now. Hed know hoe to help … at least, help relieve stress ;) “

From belhind him, “hello dean.”

He jumped, turns to see cas in his ass.

“Get out of my ass!”

“Castiel gives him a very annoyed tlook and moves around the table.

“I’m sure your brother woud be far more help on this than I.”

Dean lioks at him in bewilderment. “ sorry man, I am just NOT into that kind of thing.”

Castiel gives him a trademadrk confused look. “I mean i n regards to the case dean.” 

“Oh.”

Dean sighs sadnessly and returns to the table, leaning over the notes.

“We should lfuck”

He whips around. “What?”

Castuel stares at him confused ly 

“We should fuck. S that not the wasy someone would express interest in sexual intercourse?”

Dean looks at him in awe.

“Arent u just a bunch of angel waves thought?”

“Yes, but i hve a body.” Catil leans in cloe to dean. “A body with urges>’

“Ive never done thiswith a guy before” Dan warns 

“Its okay” cas says. “ I love you so much it wont hurt.”

“Yes baby plz”

Castiel looks up in shoock

So does dean.

Who was that?

“Oh, dont stop please,” Sam pleads. “It was just getting good.” 

Dean sighs and runs a hand through his haidr. 

“You can have cas just give me the pie”

“oKay?”

Dean takes the bag from Sam and screams in disgust.

“This is cake! Ur the worst rbother ever!”

Cas is already mine” Sam cries. They quickly abscond to have loving intercourse

“Ell fuck” dean sighs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, if someone could tell me how to break a work into parts id really appreciate it? I don't think soopernatural fits in with i am a vapire to be honest, so let me know!
> 
> -brainlessomniscent


	4. Roonikl Wazlib x Dragon Smok and Wolfstat SMUTTTTTTTT;)))))))))D8=D

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco x Ron and Wolfstar, because obviously you need this in your life ;)

Draco ighs dramatically “wait til y father hears about tyhis!!!!!” 

“Wait til hermoine punches you again. Now eat sligs malfoy” Rons says. “Remember what happened last time?”

Draco huffs and polishes another trophy. “I hate detntion you suck” Draco starts peeing in the cup. “Romald, hears whaty i think you re pissblood”

Rn hears what draco Is doinga . He tuns around ns and screams “what artreyou doing!!”

“Um I;m pooping you low scum.” Ron picks up a cord and turns to strangle draco with it. When all of a sufden things strat changing around them. Dracos peeing still and when things get weird ron finally removes the chain from his neck. 

“Where are we “ Draco whimpers. 

Suddenyl, they hears voices behind them argiing.

“I cant believe were in detention.”

“In mt defense, this is ACTUALLY your fault for once Moony.”

“How is it my fault you deided to bow up the girls lavatory, BADfoot??!” 

Ron whips around, chain i n hand and dragging malfoy by the neck. “Is that…?” THe two boys behind them ar polishing a sparse amount of trophies. Ince, the brown haired boy might have been handsome but now his face had rouhg scars and scabs covering him. He looked as if a honey badger attacked him, and he seemed bery tired as if that honey badger bashed him day and nght except for now obviously.

The other boy was short compared to the brown ahired one and had a jawline that could cut throught the chain thet had strangled draco. MM damn. Hi s hair was drk and ravashing as Jess Cullen’s whoever that is. 

“Is that….. Professor Loopin?” 

“Draco says “ redicilous!” an hands Ron the cup of piss, rubbing his neck. “My faither will hears about this!”

Ron then turns o the dark haired boy and gives his cop of piss. “Hear you go mate.”

“Bloody hell that stinks!’ the dark haired boy retches and gives the cup to the boy he called moony. The boy takes a deep sniff.

“What the hell is this!” he excalims passing it back to draco.

“My poop,” Draco sneers and passes it back to ron 

This goes on for a while, like, two hours and Draco says “This is like four boys one cup!” 

“Bloody hell youre right!” ron excaims. 

Being the sensible one, Moony says , “This is quite enough!” he exclaims. He takes the piss cup and drinks all the liquid within, “there!” 

He stops and smacks his lips . “Wow i mean it was nt bad for piss.” 

“Whar piss have you drinken!” Ron exclaims!

“Well first of all sirious ‘s here.” Moony claims triumphently, patting the dark haired boy on the back. 

“Yeha yeah were into some obviously kibky shit” The boy called sirius winks. 

“Wait,” Ron excalims. “You’re siruus ? As in sirius balck?”

“The one and only “ He bows.

“Iknow your grandson!”

“Granson?”

“I mean godson!”

“Look at my face boy, I’m only 15!”

“Oh.” Ron looks at Draco. Draco looks back. They simultaneously look at the chain. “Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhybloodyhell.”

“My father will hear about this” Draco mumbles, coniving to hinself. 

“This chain is a time turner’ Rom explains. “It must have been a trophy for some dumbass a long time ago.”

Remus takes the cain and stares at it. He pulls another one from his pocket. “This ones mine” he says quietly. 

“Oh.” Ron says. “Oops. Sorry m8.” Remus looks down dejectedly and hands it back. 

“Well, anyway. You’re stuck in the past. “ Remus explains. “The time turner only goe s backward.” 

Sirius cockilu saunters to Dracos side and puts an arm around his shoulders. “Have you ever tried anal, boy?”

“What.”

“Anyway whos this godson of mine?” Sirius liiks over to Ron 

Ron smiles snealiliy (sneaky) and claims “well, remus and James’s son of coursw!” 

James bursts in at thet moment and yells, “I love you remus! You’re a-” Sirius decks the boy, raching for the chain in rons hands. 

“Im gonna kill you potter!” he excalims. “And your little dog too!” Ron fighs back, 

“This is my chain!” 

“Remus suggests quietly “ Actually, technically it’s my chain but whateves,” 

Resmus glides forward, and takes sirius roughly by the houlders. “Oh my gosh, i cant believe you did that for me Sirius! I love you!” He kisses the dog boy passionately on the cheek, making out there where the dimple lies. Remus and sirius being themselves make out over James’ lifeless looking body. 

Draco sees the passionate embrace and decided to do the same. He sees ron and says “Ive never tried anal before “ seductively. 

“Really, its fun” Ron replies. 

Draco takes the time turner from ron and says “Turn around baby” Ron does and draco ties a trophy to his writs. “All tiesd up now baby” and they kiss. 

Suddenyl drco wakes up, finding himself drooling on a trophy. He sees ron walk in and says “Have you ever done anal?”

The end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol thank you for dealing with my endless bullshit


End file.
